There is significant research that suggests the words we choose influence the chemistry in our brain and body. This stunning concept enables us to think about how we can consciously regain control of our mind, brain, and body when we are more thoughtful about our language. Simple awareness can immediately help shift the narrative and draw on the creator voice in all of us which maneuvers us towards other possibilities.
This sounds complex but it really is simple when you break it down a bit further: Trigger Words & Emotion Words.
- Certain words trigger reactions in our brain and body when they are merely uttered. I call these trigger words. Trigger words send your brain a signal that trouble is coming.
- The second way language impairs our physiology is when we experience emotional attachment to our memories. I call these emotion-centric words.
Each of these internal languages has tremendous influence over our thoughts and can rapidly influence neurological impacts on our brain and body.
Dr. Caroline Leaf has spent the last 20 years considering how we can take agency over our mind, brain, and body. Language is a key player in this as we become more self-aware.
Are there certain words that are instant triggers for you?
For me, it’s the word “feedback”. This one word has a unique impact on my heart, mind, and body. It sets me off into a thousand thoughts that shape my expectations and reactions the moment it is uttered. Through my 20 years of experience in executive leadership, I have also noticed that this is a trigger word for many managers and professionals.
Trigger words prompt your body into fight mode, as if you are preparing for war. There is the mighty fight, flight, or freeze response that your beautiful operating system (the brain) relies on to keep you safe from harm. What’s amazing about this is that we can actually rewire our thinking process so language can optimize our lives.
You have that power within you every day to operate with greater coherence and agency. Think of it like a computer engineer who can rewrite the code for software to run more efficiently. When you take a moment to truly consider what you are thinking, you will find your brain has been given language tools to rewire thoughts. When you begin to pay attention to the language, which by the way you have assigned it, you can rewrite the narrative.
Like a masterful editor, you can simplify, clarify, and redirect the patterns that have become automatic. When you slow your thoughts down you can shift your language choices to rewire your mental patterns.
To start the process, let’s go back to the basics of collecting the evidence. I want you to create awareness when you feel your body responding to something that causes you distress.
In the second scenario, specific emotion-centric words can become wickedly immobilizing. They inhabit deeper memories making the significance of the language very powerful. One way to think of this is when we shift a noun into an adjective such as depressed into depression. The words we speak can easily be interpreted by the brain as literal because they send messages to your brain and alter the chemistry in your body.
Emotion-centric words such as depressed, anxious or frightened can be tethered to deeper attachments. When I say to myself or others, “I am so depressed”. My brain actually hears, “I am depression” and my body begins to feel this more intensely. I feel sullen, empty, and deeply alone. My brain is searching for memories of when I felt this way before.
However, you can shift the narrative and your brain’s interpretation by inserting a bridge, such as “I am experiencing depression”. This simple addition refers you to a temporary state.
This will enable you to take the steps below with the explicit understanding that these are temporary feelings that will pass if you apply discipline during the process.
As a side note, we will experience seasons of distress in our lives from time to time. However, when they cause us anguish, anxiety, and hopelessness, we have lost sight of our power to reshape the narrative. Remember your feelings are messengers. They alert your brain which tells your body there may be something dangerous or out of whack nearby. This becomes a great reminder to you that you can step back and reassess.
Sounds so easy right? Not exactly.
Like any new experience, you can overcome your fears by using baby steps to influence the neuropathways that were originally created. The pathway involves four simple steps. When you begin this as a process, you have already unleashed your agency over what to do next. This in turn signals to your brain, you got this!
- Step One: Think- Define what you are thinking when you feel uncomfortable.
- Step Two: Feel- Identify how it makes you feel. (i.e. anxious, frightened, uncertain, etc.)
- Step Three: Choose- Define the new thought you want to create.
- Step Four: Create- Determine one action that you could take to revise your narrative.
Now let’s try it.
Using my example of the word “feedback”, I thought a lot about why that was so frightening to me. As I became self-aware, I realized that I interpreted that word to mean judgment. I was afraid that I was being judged and that I would somehow be seen as incompetent. Perhaps that is a little imposter syndrome that lives in the background. Something I also work on every day.
Neuro-pathways run deep and they require constant management. Isn’t it interesting that just the word “feedback” reduced me mentally to a person on the defensive? For example, I remember being in a meeting and the person across the desk simply said, “I want to give you some feedback”. On its face that is really a neutral statement, but my mind attached all of these lingering values to the language. See where I am going here?
The change happened when I began to think (step one) and realize how it made me feel (step 2). Quickly, I was able to work up a list of words that were less triggering. I wrote out a list of words and arrived at the word “observation”. For me, that word was neutral and allowed me to consider what another had observed. “Feedback” felt like conclusions had already been made and I had no control whereas when I choose (step 3) the word “observations” I felt empowered in my thinking to see collaboration in the conversation.
The next step was to act on this with diligence so I could create (step 4) the space I wanted and reconstruct new memories. Whenever anyone asked me if they could share some feedback, I asked if we could jointly refer to them as observations. Guess what? Not a single person pushed back and in fact, it seemed to relieve any tension they may have been experiencing as well.
You can rewire your language and impact your mind, brain, and body because you have the agency to create narratives that are positive and constructive. I encourage you to step into those moments when you feel triggered. Identify how they make you feel and choose a new word to create a different outcome. This takes time to do consistently, but like any new habit, you can rewire your brain to navigate a new path forward.